The Magic Ends at Midnight

cinderella3Don’t you just love to have “ah ha” moments? It happened to me while I was watching Cinderella a couple of days ago. When Cinderella was walking down the palace staircase entering the ball, all eyes were on her and she was a beautiful princess. I thought how much she reminded me of my own daughter. I see her as a beautiful princess, just perfect and kind and courageous. Yeah, that’s who I see when I look at her. Just before this scene, the Fairy Godmother turned Cinderella into who she really is, from a country girl into a princess. Then just as Cinderella was heading to the ball in the pumpkin-turned-carriage, the Fairy Godmother told her that the magic was only good until midnight. It wasn’t forever, and everything would go back the way it was. Well that hit me like a brick! All these years, I have been rescuing my daughter, magically making everything right for her. But I really need to stop that. The magic should only be good for a short while, then she needs to get back to her “regular” life and move forward, on her journey of embracing who she really is. I noticed that the Fairy Godmother didn’t keep coming back to Cinderella and using magic to fix everything. I feel like I’ve been doing that all these years with my daughter. I’ve been a rescuer, and an enabler. It’s time for the magic to be done. It’s midnight and she needs to move forward on her own. This is a hard lesson for me and I don’t know why it has taken me this long to see that I can’t solve other people’s problems. If I keep interfering, how will they learn and grow? What will they do when I am gone? How will they become independent? I will take Cinderella’s mother’s advice – I will “have courage and be kind,” and stop waving my magic wand.

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